All my life I have had tremendous sexual energy. Lust thats been hard to work off. If this Olympian type carnality could have been properly harnessed... I would have been like King Solomon.

With five hundred descendants.

And God help the world if that was the case. One of me is enough.

When you lust all the time, lets face it, even for the luckiest of us, Brad Pitt for example. I dont care who you are, theres only limited opportunities to expunge it.

But it has to be expelled somehow.

This has led to some extremely embarrassing moments. My parents, like most parents of the Baby Boom generation, taught me shame of the human body and sexuality.even though they had me, and my sister.

I got my first orgasm doing chin-ups on a glass shower stall.

No joke!

I had been feeling queer lately (odd, not gay). I was sixteen. Or maybe, fourteen. What else do you do with your spare time when youre fourteen in 1964...except chin-ups? Like every day in P.E.

I decided to do a little exercise in the shower. So I did chin-ups flat up against a glass shower door (gripping a metal bar overhead). My developing male organ was, how can I put it delicately, making up and down contact with the glass.

Suddenly, I felt very good. The best Id ever felt in my life to be exact. Gee! I said. These chin-ups sure are certainly pleasant today for some reason. I wonder why? Like, its the easiest set of chin-ups Ive ever done.

I just, cant seem to stop doing them.

Oh, this is great. Ive just set my own personal best record for doing chin-ups. Why is it I dont feel tired? Why is it I can do so many of these? Am I superman? Whats going on?

And then, powww!

Wow! I shouted. What is that?

The rest is history.

Suddenly, to no great surprise, chin-ups became my favorite sport. Chin-ups in the shower. Not regular outside chin-ups. I started taking five showers a day. I had never in my life been so clean.

My parents were puzzled.

I became a chin-up swinger, a lothario, a clean-freak nymphomaniac.

I think Ill take a shower, I told my mother.

You just took one two hours ago, she would say. Okay. Whats going on?

Sex is like a narcotic. The more you do it, the more you want, and you have to expand, enlarge the experience. I decided to move up a notch and to start the action this time with a sexy costume, the only one I had at the timemy PE jockstrap.

Like a stripper, I would remove this after a few chin-upsandyou know the rest.

I was doing the first set of chin-ups, the hot water running, really getting into itand the door burst open and my parents came storming in (this was before drug problems with teens).

I was caught red-handedor rather..hand over head.

I could have easily told them, hey! Im practicing for the Olympic Games.

It wouldnt have worked. Whatever you do when youre fourteen, they assume its dirty.

Theyre right.

But they couldnt stop me from taking showers.

The sessions continued.

Copyright 2006 by SammonSays.com