Do you know how your kids really think? Would you like to find out and build character too? Here are 3 simple questions that you can use. Recently, my granddaughter, Daniela (Dani), rushed home to tell her mother, "I can tie my shoes!" Andrea hugged and praised her. At our Sunday breakfast, Andrea proudly announced, "Dani can tie her shoes!" Daniela's grin widened as everyone congratulated her. Having counseled kids for years, I know the joy of understanding how children think. Helping kids discuss their successes is a great way to understand their thinking and build character too. Later, while Dani and I sat on the sofa, I used my 3 simple questions to help Dani discuss her success even more. "Dani, can you tell me more about tying your shoes?" I asked. "Well, I was at PE and I tied them," she answered. "What was happening when you tied your shoes?" "I was standing against the wall. I saw that one of my shoes was untied. I asked the teacher to tie it but she said, "No," answered Dani. "What were you thinking when you tied your shoes?" I asked. I remembered how my daddy taught me. The first time I tried, it didn't work but the second time it did. I told Dani how much I enjoyed finding out how well her mind worked. Her face told me that she enjoyed the telling. She smiled and nodded, "Yes." At that moment, I believe her self-esteem blossomed even more. I also learned that she didn't give up and tried a second time. In a Nutshell the 3 Simple Questions Are: 1. Can you tell me more about...?
2. What was happening when you...?
3. What were you thinking when you...? These 3 simple questions reinforce character and give children the three things all kids want from parents: 1. Attention
2. Appreciation
3. Affection Using these questions will bring you satisfaction in knowing your child's thoughts plus the joy that your child is thinking well. Why not write these 3 questions down and use them often when your child shares a success? You'll be raising self-esteem, pleasing your child, and pleasing yourself. You'll be building character too. |
